The Slow Burn

Unfolding in the stillness

In the slow decay of my old ways

Tenderly releasing the patterns that have woven their way

So deep into my bones,

The uncurling of their grip

Finding space in the density

Clarity in the coming home

Again and again

Peace emerging from pain

Reaching deeper in the roots of it all

Melting aways the hardness

Softening to the truth of my soul

xxaL - Allison Landis 9.24.25

Excavating myself from a year of unpredictable shifts and deep grief, I find myself living in Massachusettes for the first time in my life, tending to my body and my family. and relearning how to BE. Easier said then done, slowing down has felt extremely challenging. The Summer season was full of high and lows, experiencing the purest joy and the most tragic loss. My husband and I went through a miscarriage in August that quickly became a dark night of the soul. For 13 days after we discovered there was no heart beat, my body fought both to hold on to our precious gift and also release what could not be. And without thinking, I fell into daily ceremony. Each day bringing me closer to a deep connection with spirit which I had been ignoring in the chaos of a move across the east coast.

The next two weeks: we juice cleansed, I lit candles, sat with Tea, danced with Cacao, ritualized baths, showers and every other moment of my day. I opened my home and asked for support, and my community showed up all the way. The evenings we shared were a powerful medicine. Allowing me to re write so many narratives about my loneliness and how I feel about my place in the world. We laughed and cried, and I was so held and loved. What I noticed most, was that I was not the only one in pain. Every human that showed up was connecting with what we were feeling because they have felt it too. It was clear that every connection I had made in the last 10 years mattered. The work, the play, the practices… it ALL matters.

Fall Equinox brought me to Colorado to witness the final performance of a music artist that has profoundly impacted my healing and my ability to be with my shadow, without shame. For two days, we celebrated the amazing community that surrounds the music and art of Dave Tipper, and what it has done for us. Truly, some of the most healing 48 hours of my life. From sun showers and double rainbows before the first set to the powerful new moon eclipse on Sunday, every single moment felt aligned and magical.

I returned to my new home in Massachusetts feeling more grateful than ever and with a knowing that I am exactly where I’m meant to BE, and there is no rush to turn the page tho the next thing, just yet. As I look around at my new home, walk into the forest behind it, or snuggle on the couch with my family, I am so thankful for the simplicity that life has thrust upon me. This is the season of chopping wood, carrying water, and returning to myself in the most sincere way. Holding me through this journey, I have entered into a daily practice of cha dao - the way of tea; the spirit of tea has lead me to be in a loving container as a slowly process this grief and to be with my fellow tea students and our teacher is exactly the structure my little cancer heart needs to feel safe to let go.

And for all the pain I have felt, there is a path back to joy, through surrender and creation.

I surrender to the magic of autumn and the way it teaches us that transformation is a process,

each of us returning home in our own time.

I am excited to be able to be back in Florida several times before the end of the year, giving me an opportunity to create with some of my favorite humans. We will be hosting DUB Temple at OM Meditation & Wellness in Safety Harbor, Friday, October 3rd at 8pm; a way to honor the spirit of Fall and connect with community that has given so much to me.

Connect with the @dubtemple community on instagram and stay tuned in to all the offerings and opportunities to connect with our faciliators.

Thank YOU for Existing! XxaL